.jpg)
I remember the time the movie DEAR JOHN (By Nicholas Sparks) came out. I was a newly grad and I still had the high hormones and thrill for anyone with the bad-boy image, the knight-in-shining-armor-modern-gear which are the black leather jackets, jeans and boots, as well as the tight muscle shirts, and of course--The Uniforms! (I still am in love with a Military Man as I always am, but hey can't fault me for that!!)
I guess it's imperative to say, that I watched it because I was head-over-heels in love with Channing Tatum. I remember how sad it was for me to watch it, I was alone----my friends apparently had previous engagements and I wanted to escape the 4-walls of my room so there I was Tralalalalalalaling on my way to the movie house.
Good Grief!! 2 hours into the movie I began sobbing...Not because they were shooting at Channing Tatum and how sad I was no hunky guy like that was in love with me---but simply, I can relate with how Amanda Seyfried's character felt.
I was madly in love with someone from the United States Military-And though he seemingly had a shady past, I accepted all of it. Now, back to the point of my tears--I knew how it felt like to be not able to sleep for a week wondering where he is, I know how it feels like to have plans messed up by some freakin anti-terrorist jam, new orders, stations, deployments and so on.
I remembered anything I ate tasted like card board (but I think those times card-board would have tasted better!!) whenever I would hear the news on how Iraq unrest was raising and my man in uniform-back then was nowhere to be seen online.
Even though that was years ago, I still have bittersweet memories of Him and though us not working out is a different story---I could only imagine what he wanted to tell me back then--...
********************************************************************************************
Fast forward into the future, I am now happily entering a new cycle in my relationship--(Though this time, with another military Man and a soon-to-be-captain! Wheeee!!) I would just like to share the same letter that has saved him from Me cutting ties with him for good!
*********************************************************************************************
"I cannot promise you every night of my life. I cannot promise to be beside you for every difficult moment, every trial and every hardship. In truth, I can promise you that I will not be with you for most. I will leave you at inconvenient times. Any special date to us may be tainted with the anniversary of the death of one of my friends. I will ask you to take over whatever life we have built together for months and years at a time. And will then crash back into that life that you have used your sweat, your tears and your heartache to keep together and try to take it back as I knew it before. I will shut you out at times because it will be the best way for me to hold it together at that moment. I will lie to you. I will tell you I don't know things when I do. I will not always tell you where I am going, when I will be back or who I am with. I may not call you for weeks and months and you will not be able to call me. You will ask questions that I won't answer. You will know answers to questions that you will hope you never need. I will share things with my brothers that you will never understand. They may know things about me that you never will. They will be a support to me in some things that you cannot be. I will miss birthdays. I will miss anniversaries. I may need time to process things that seem natural to everyone else. It will seem that someone or something will always take precedence over you. You may lose me long before you ever thought possible. I will uproot you and ask you to re-establish our family anywhere in the world, in any season, at any time, over and over again. Sand and mud will be tracked through your halls from the boots I am too tired to take off. I will leave you when you beg me not to. I will stand at attention while you cry beside me. I will walk away. I will knowingly break your heart. And I will do it again - and again. I cannot promise you all of me. I cannot promise you much of anything. But if you will have me, I can promise that as I march away from you- it is not without sharing your heartache. I promise you that every time I break your heart I will be breaking mine. Every time that I cannot answer you I will be protecting you. Whenever you want to call and you have no number to dial- I will be wanting to do the same. I will protect everything that we have created together with every fiber of my being while you do the same back at home. I will honor you in everything -every moment that we are apart and every moment that I am with you. I will fight harder and push further knowing that I do so for you. And I will carry you with me in everything until my sandy boots once again sit just inside our door."
********************************************************************************
Tear Jerking I know!! I'm sure there are other Military ladies out there!!
Hang-on to your MAN!! Remember we do it with a HOOAH~!!
